I used to be love drunk, but now Im hungover.

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Somebody,
Just,
Kill,
Me.

I really had enough. This is prolonged torture. Did I do something so wrong my last life or what? So many times have I thought I hit rock-bottom, and then I find my life continuing down-slope.

Seriously, I've been losing my optimism for months, even years. Now, I don't even see my optimism any more. Where's the happy happy me, my friend asked. I'll tell you, it's gone. My happiness doesn't last no more.

Another thing. I've been thinking. Everything has changed so drastically ever since. You can go on and on all about yourself, what about me? My voice is unheard. You're not even the right person I can talk to any more. I'm just back to my own self. With my thoughts and feelings bottled. Nobody to open it up to. I've been searching for a new friend for 3 years. I found nobody. And I feel like it's time for me to give it up, stop hoping, put things behind me, look ahead, and move on.

Did someone curse me or something? I just don't understand why I've been so damn unlucky. Life isn't quite at its worst yet, but it can certainly be much, much, much better.

Someone just.. bring me out of this ~~pool of shit~~ mess.. please.

Disclaimer: Please take my words in this post with a pinch of salt. I just needed somewhere to vent my frustrations. I apologise for offending someone.

I need a little more luck than a little bit
'Cause every time I get stuck the words won't fit
And every time I tried I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by
I need a little more help than a little bit
Like the perfect one word no one's heard yet
'Cause every time I tried I get tongue tied
I need a little good luck to get me by this time

- 11:45 PM

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Shi Hong

19
25.11
National Slave, Forced (NSF)

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